The battle of the sexes

I'll recall today some of the witty, corny, politically incorrect and hopefully funny stuff I have come across. I'm sure I have more; they'll come out of the woodwork by and by.

First, an ode to the power of the well-positioned comma:
A man, without a woman, is a beast
A man without, a woman is a beast

While it is often true that behind every great man is a woman, one wag has suggested that behind every big man is a bigger behind (I can here the hisses already).

This one below, which to be fair to me I heard when I was a callow fellow, is definitely not PC in today's Women Power age, but here it is even as I'm dodging the brickbats:

A man and his wife walk into a restaurant. He starts to order. "I'll have the soup of the day, and this donkey here will have the french onion soup."

The waiter is startled but takes the order. The woman does not seem perturbed.

Then the man orders the main course and coffee for himself and tea for his wife, each time referring to her as "donkey".

The waiter cannot contain himself any longer. "Ma'am, why are you letting him insult you?"

The woman replies: "He hor, always talk like that. He hor, does that everywhere we go to! He hor..."

Ouch, ouch! Okay, okay, in penance here's a bumper sticker as supposedly spotted: "When God created man, she was only joking."

And women will have the last word(s) here.

This is from the late American wit Dorothy Parker: "Don't put all your eggs in one bastard".

And from the (much married) actress Zsa Zsa Gabor: "A man is incomplete before marriage. After that, he is finished!"