How to conduct an open appraisal report

This very funny one below was emailed to me by a university classmate...

The HR manager received the following appraisal report one day:

Bob Smith, my assistant programmer, can always be found

hard at work at his desk. He works independently, without

wasting company time talking to colleagues. Bob never

thinks twice about assisting fellow employees, and always

finishes given assignments on time. Often he takes extended

measures to complete his work, sometimes skipping coffee

breaks. Bob stands out as an individual who has absolutely no

vanity in spite of his high accomplishments and profound

knowledge in his field. I firmly believe that Bob can be

classed as an asset employee, the type which cannot be

dispensed with. Consequently, I duly recommend that Bob be

promoted at once to executive management. His current position will be

made redundant as soon as possible.

[NOW READ BELOW...]
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Later that day, the same HR manager received the following addendum:

Addendum:
That idiot was standing over my shoulder while I wrote the report
sent to you earlier today. Kindly re-read only the odd numbered lines.