Sunday, February 19, 2012

A cautionary poem about time...

No time? A cautionary poem

Found on a church's notice board:


Just one more CEO joke...

Arriving in a hotel in KL Sentral (Malaysia), the man everyone calls Uncle Tony went to the bar and asked for a pint of draught Guinness stout.

The barman nodded and said, "That will be one ringgit (one Malaysian dollar) please, Uncle Tony."

Somewhat surprised, Uncle Tony said, "That's very cheap," and promptly handed over his money.

"Well, we try to stay ahead of the competition", said the barman. "And we are serving free pints every Wednesday evening from 6pm until 8pm. We have the cheapest draught in Asia."

"That is remarkable value," Uncle Tony said.

The barman spoke again: "I see you don't seem to have a glass, so you'll probably need one of ours. That will be 3 ringgit, please."

Uncle Tony scowled, but paid up. He took his drink and walked towards a seat.

"Ah, Uncle, you want to sit down?" said the barman. "That'll be an extra 2 ringgit. You could have pre-book the seat, and it would have only cost you a ringgit. By the way, I think you may to be too big for the seat, sir. May I get you to sit in this frame for a moment, please."

Uncle Tony attempted to sit down but the frame was too small and when he could not squeeze in much as he tried, he complained: "Nobody would fit in that little frame."

"I'm afraid if you can't fit in the frame, you'll have to pay an extra surcharge of 4 ringgit for your seat, sir."

Uncle Tony swore quietly to himself, but paid up as he had had a long day.

"I see that you have brought your laptop with you," added the barman. "And since that wasn't pre-booked either, that will be another 3 ringgit to use it here."

Uncle Tony was so annoyed by now that he walked back to the bar, slammed his drink on the counter, and yelled, "This is ridiculous, I want to speak to the manager."

"Ah, sir, I see you want to use the counter," says the barman, "That will be 2 ringgit, please."

Uncle Tony's face was red with rage.

"Do you know who I am?"

"Of course I do, sir. You are the well-known CEO."

Uncle Tony: "I've had enough, What sort of hotel is this? I come in for a quiet drink and you treat me like this. I insist on speaking to the manager!"

Barman: "Here is his email address; or if you wish, you may contact him between 9am and 9.10 every morning, Mondays to Tuesdays on this phone number. Calls are free, until they are answered; then there is a talking charge of only 10 sen per second provided you use Tune Talk. Using other mobile carriers will incur our normal charge of 30 sen per second."

"I will never use this bar again!"

"OK, Uncle Tony , but remember, we are the only bar in Asia selling pints for one ringgit... so that now everyone can drink."

Compliments are soooo nice!

I have been receiving a few compliments this past week! Someone wrote a very nice comment at the bottom of my 15 Feb blog entry ("70 years ago today... when S'pore became Syonan-to").

Then, at work at the weekend, two reporters (separately) messaged me to thank me for improving their copy. The two Sunday Times stories in question are "Nightmare after D&D nights" (page 14) and "Are law students cut from the same cloth?" (page 21).

Finally, at church, someone asked me: "Are you still writing your columns in the newspaper?" I replied that I have been rather busy and also told him about my blog. He then said: "I enjoyed your commentaries. They are well-written and insightful."

Wow!

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