I found I had zero retention of tears, earlier in the week. Natural tears, necessary to lubricate my eyes, kept draining away; hence my extremely uncomfortable dry eyes. The eye doc said so. The range should be 10-15 (forgot to ask what!) for normal peeps.
So the eye doc suggested that he insert a pair of tear duct plugs (the fanciful name is "punctal plugs"), one into each tear duct (puncta) to block the duct.
The cost of those two tiny rice grain-sized silicon implants? $400 ($200 per eye) for a two-minute job (one minute per eye)!
Moral of this story for young people: If you have steady hands and like to poke people in the eye, go become an eye surgeon! It pays. And at least your shoes won't give you away, as in this -- yet another -- "doctor joke" just told to me today:
Q: In a surgical theatre where everyone is all suited up, how do you tell the difference between the surgeon, the urologist and the anaesthetist?
A: The surgeon has blood on his shoes, the urologist urine, and the anaesthetist coffee.
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I also found myself with a bout of feeling bloated. Here's what one website suggested in dealing with this problem (as usual, caveat emptor always on medical tips):
Bloating for beginners First, the basics. Bloating is something that affects most people at some point in their life. "Bloating is a very common problem and is reported in up to 30% of the population in some studies," says Dr Sally Parry, a consultant gastroenterologist. "Subjectively, it's the sensation that is often associated with abdominal distension - the visible increase in abdominal girth. Not everyone who complains of bloating will also have objective abdominal distension. Bloating is commonly associated with people suffering from symptoms of a functional gut disorder of which irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) is the commonest. IBS is more common in younger women so by default bloating is more likely to be described in this population group."
Food for thought While beans have traditionally been thought of as a cause of bloating, people are often surprised by the wide range of other foods that can have the same effect. "Cruciferous vegetables - broccoli, Brussels sprouts, cauliflower - are some examples of food items that can cause bloating," reveals S. Radi Shamsi MD, a Los Angeles-based gastroenterologist. "Beans are the obvious common answer. Dairy intolerance or a genetic enzyme deficiency can also be a leading cause for a great many individuals. Any dairy product can cause a more gradual onset of these symptoms, along with diarrhoea or constipation."
Chew on this If you're the type of person who crams down a sarnie before rushing out the door, it might be worth changing your eating habits. "Another factor that can lead to bloating is if the body isn't producing enough (or doesn't have enough time to produce) stomach acid or digestive enzymes," points out Angela Walker, a nutritional therapist at Fabulous Nutrition. "Take time to eat, and chew thoroughly - I recommend counting at least 25 chews for the first three mouthfuls of each meal. Chewing properly allows the signals to go to the stomach and pancreas to start secreting digestive juices. Additionally, try having a teaspoon of apple cider vinegar in a glass of tepid water before each meal - this can help to stimulate the digestive juices."
Bloating and booze It's not just beer that can lead to that bloated feeling - the high sugar content means that most types of alcoholic drink can have the same effect, points out Angela Walker. "Alcohol is a concentrated source of sugar which can be a bloating trigger for some individuals. Sugar also helps to feed the 'unfriendly' bacteria, so this isn't ideal for optimal gut health."
Watch your water intake While water is essential when it comes to keeping our bodies functioning effectively, drinking too much can make it harder for our digestive juices to do their job. "A little water with meals can help digestive juices, but drinking too much can dilute these digestive juices, inhibiting optimal digestion," warns Angela Walker. "So a small glass of water, sipped slowly during a meal, may help. Opt for still rather than sparkling water if bloating is a problem."
Say yes to yoghurt A recent study conducted by researchers at the University Hospital of South Manchester suggested that probiotic yoghurt drinks can help to reduce bloating by speeding up gastrointestinal transit. "A course of probiotics has been shown to be beneficial in some studies and is definitely worth trialling," agrees Dr Sally Parry. "Similarly, Natural bio yogurt can help. Some people also benefit from golden linseed supplements."
Dough dilemma To complicate matters, the manufacturing processes used to make many of the foods known to cause bloating have also changed. "There are new wheat strains, while farmers are also adding sulphur and nitrogen to wheat toward the end of its growth to boost yields," explains Amanda Griggs, director of health and nutrition at London's Balance clinic. "The resulting flour contains double the wheat protein parts (omega gliadins) which can trigger inflammatory reactions in the gut.
Go easy on the gum If you're prone to bloating, it's all too easy to think that the problem can be cured by cutting down on your food intake, but doing this can have the opposite effect - and don't use diet drinks or chewing gum to stave off hunger pangs, either. "Don't go for long periods without eating," warns Amanda Griggs. "Be sure to eat regular meals. Avoid diet drinks and sugar free gums containing sorbitol - this substance can't be absorbed by the body and will cause gas in the colon."
Sitting uncomfortably? We all know how important posture is when it comes to avoiding back pain, but it's also crucial when it comes to our digestive system. "The reason bloating takes place is the reduced level of production of necessary enzymes needed for digestion and the fact that when we're in a hurry, we don't make time for proper meal," says Amanda Griggs. "We eat under anxiety at our desks. You'll be surprised how sitting hunched over our desk will create gas, through suppressing the spine which in turn supports all of our bodily functions."
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