Monday, March 31, 2014

One more 'walk into a bar' joke... Tiger Woods and Stevie Wonder.

Stevie Wonder and Tiger Woods walk into a bar...
Woods turns to Wonder and says: "How is the singing career going?"

Stevie Wonder replies: "Not too bad! How's the golf?"

Woods replies: "Not too bad. I've had some problems with my swing, but I think I've got that right now."

Stevie Wonder says: "I always find that when my swing goes wrong, I need to stop playing for a while and not think about it. Then, the next time I play, it seems to be all right.

Tiger Woods (taken by surprise that a blind person plays golf) says: "You play golf?"

Stevie Wonder says: "Oh, yes. I've been playing for years."

Woods says: "But, you're blind. How can you play golf if you're blind?"

Wonder replies: "I get my caddy to stand in the middle of the fairway and call to me. I listen for the sound of his voice and play the ball towards him. Then, when I get to where the ball lands, the caddy moves to the green or farther down the fairway and again I play the ball towards his voice."

"But, how do you putt?" asks Woods, still skeptical.

"Well," says Stevie Wonder, "I get my caddy to lean down in front of the hole and call to me with his head on the ground and I just play the ball towards his voice."

Woods asks: "What's your handicap?"

Stevie Wonder says: "Well, I'm a scratch golfer."

Woods, incredulous, says to Stevie Wonder: "We've got to play a round some time."

Stevie Wonder replies: "Well, people don't take me seriously, so I only play for money, and never play for less than $10,000 a hole."

Woods thinks about it and finally says: "OK, I'm game for that. When would you like to play?"

Stevie Wonder says: "Pick a night!"

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