GNP a.k.a. grossest national product

I started to wonder why my last couple of postings had this fixation with certain anatomical parts or functions. Then it hit me... My urology checkup (for my enlarged prostate) is due soon, and I'm edgy. I now go to NUH and the urologist on duty will see me. Last time it was a woman. Admittedly, her "digital" skill was good, and I'm not referring to the stuff you read in ST's Digital Life.

Anyway, I still have three scatological (toilet humour) items a.k.a GNP (see heading above) that I want to, um, unload. The first is very fresh... a news item about "Toylet video games" from the Land of the Rising Sun:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2011/jan/19/toylet-video-games-japanese-men/print

If you do click on the link above, learn a new word too: micturition.

Okay, "GNP" item number two (very old, very gross):

Q: What do the spaceship Enterprise and toilet paper have in common?
A: They both circle Uranus and wipe out Klingons.

Google "Uranus jokes" (there are more than 2,000 entries) to sample the dividing line over such jokes.One wag wondered if this genre should be called "ass-tronomy".

Last one (for now). I kind of liked it when I first read it in an email, but others may beg to differ:

The Plan
In the beginning was the Plan.
And then came the Assumptions.
And the assumptions were without form.
And the plan was without substance.
And darkness was upon the faces of the workers.
And they spoke among themselves saying, "It is a crock of shit and it stinks."
And the workers went unto their Supervisors and said, "It is a pail of dung and we cannot live with the smell."
And the supervisors went unto their Managers saying, "It is a container of organic waste and it is very strong such that none may abide by it."
And the managers went unto their Directors, saying, "It is a vessel of fertilizer and none may abide by it."
And the Directors spoke among themselves, saying to one another, "It contains that which aids plant growth and it is very powerful."
And the Vice Presidents went to the President, saying unto him, "This new plan will actively promote growth and vigour of the company with very powerful effects."
And the president looked upon the plan and saw that it was good.
And the plan became Policy.
And this is how shit happens.