What's in a name (cont'd)

I'm not done with names yet. Also, I'll refer here only to names as spelled using the English alphabet.

Many Chinese names have three parts: the family name (Khoo in my case); the generational name (How); and the unique name (San). So, I'm Khoo How San, spelled the Wade-Giles way. The generational name allows "Khoo" cousins to identify each other. So, just as my own siblings are "Khoo How xxx", so are most of my father's brother's sons and daughters.

But this practice is not strictly followed. For reasons too complicated to discuss here, my eldest brother does not have "How" in the middle (but please note that this is not a Western-style middle name!).

Moreover, the Wade-Giles spelling simplicity is muddied by the Pinyin rendition. My name then becomes Qiu Xiaosan. My late paternal grandfather (or Ah Kong) chose my name. I'd like to think he has a sense of humour. My generational and unique names combined become "filial mountain". In Hokkien, there is seldom any confusion about that. But then, what on earth is a filial mountain!

It gets worse in Pinyin, because of the tonal issue (there are four tones in Mandarin). I have to explain that I am not a "small mountain". And if you mix Hokkien with Mandarin, I can even be a "crazy mountain". My Ah Kong must be laughing up there.

Meanwhile, Chinese names -- the product of 5,000 years of history -- get mangled in Anglo-dominated  countries. I lived in Australia for some years, and I was often called "Mr San" formally, and "Khoo" informally there. If the space on some form to be filled in was too tight, it had been suggested that I write down my name as "Khoo H. San" or even "Khoo San". Sigh.

Switching to "How San Khoo" fixed the surname problem but not that ang moh fixation with their darn middle name! The only, but unsatisfactory solution, was to name myself "How-San Khoo" or "Howsan Khoo". My Ah Kong must have been livid up there.

Some have caved in. The actor Chow Yuen Fatt found it easier to be called Chow Yun Fat in Hollywood. Names like Wang have not changed, but Wang is often pronounced as in "bang" instead of as in "rung".

Incidentally, many ang mohs cannot pronounce "Ng". Test it out. In fact. I believe there was once a building here called Ng Building and the owners changed it to something else so as not to trip up Anglo tongues.

Back to Australia. In the bad old days of the White Australia policy, one politician once declared "Two Wongs don't make a White". As they say, sticks and stones may break my bones, but names never hurt me.

Now, why did they call that famous man Confucius? It's confusing, sounds like a con job and does not sound Chinese!